Well, I have to share with all of you a little bit of my life these days. Background info. first: Any of you who know me extremely well know that I don't handle change well, whether big or small. It truly freaks me out. I don't like it and haven't pretty much all of my life. Well, this past Tuesday night I had a total meltdown over something non-baby related and haven't been the same since. Once the meltdown began, then I started thinking about ALL the many changes headed our way:
Don't get me wrong, Dylan is a blessing and I can't wait for him to be here, but I've started thinking, Will I be a good mom? Will I know how to take care of him? Will my body shape back up quickly? If I am not sleeping now, will I ever sleep with a newborn in our bedroom?
Dylan is literally about to rock our world with change! I have to give a HUGE hats off to my sweet husband, who has taken the brunt of my meltdown with such grace. Since Tuesday night he just keeps saying, "It's ok, it's ok, I'm not mad, your ok...." and that is after I tell him in one of my sobbing moments that I am so sorry to be acting like this. If I was him, I would be wanting to run for the hills away from the crazy pregnant women. I have to believe that my body is giving me another sign that the time is getting closer for Dylan to be here. I know that we can do this, but I guess its normal to be apprehensive. Not "scared" like everyone keeps asking me. "Are you scared?" What kind of question is that to ask a first time mom to be. Not a good one. I won't ever ask that question to a friend, acquaintance, etc. that is 9 months pregnant. I have completed 38 weeks as of today and hope to hear Dr. Deed say I am making more progress when we see her this afternoon. Yes, change is a comin', and while my first reaction is to say "Oh no!" and run, I plan to do my best to embrace it, because its a new life that is part of us and THAT change is a good one. Rachel
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
So at our checkup yesterday, everyone was a little surprised to see how much I had progressed in a few days. Dr. Deed told us she was excited and encouraged! Yeah! Dylan will be here soon which is AWESOME! I think I'm a broken record, but we are ready to meet our little man. I am having lots of Braxton Hicks and their intensity is increasing. Dr. Deed said that's just another sign that its getting closer to happening. My checklist is complete: bags packed, camera charged, house ready for our return, and someone to take care of Nelli while we are at the hospital. I guess its now just a waiting game. I think the countdown is around 18 days! I will post a picture later once Jonathan gets home and can take one of me. My belly feels like its about to drop to the floor, but its just because he has dropped down so low. He still moves around like crazy though. We are eating dinner with dear friends tonight kind of as a last hoorah so to speak before we are the family of 3. Have a great weekend and I will post updates. Next checkup is Thursday unless something happens before then. Rachel
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Well, Dylan officially has a place to call his own. His nursery is complete, as well as his "corner" of our bedroom where I have a feeling he will stay for a while. :) Even with all of these "things" in place, we hope to makes Dylan's HOME not the place but the feeling of two parents that love him unconditionally and want the best for him. I was the productive mommy yesterday morning and I put together the pack-n-play to leave in the den. I also moved the swing into the den and put it in a spot that I can see from the kitchen as well. He will be here in 4 weeks! Wow! I have been working on packing my bag which caused me to become a little nervous about all of this. Not nervous in a bad way, just a nervous/real smack in the face that this IS HAPPENING! We have truly been anxiously awaiting this baby for quite some time and feel blessed to be able to have him in our lives. I thank God everyday for giving us the opportunity to become parents this way and for blessing us with Dylan. I am pretty excited to see if our little boy has any characteristics that look like me because even though many say I look like my dad (which I kinda do) being adopted means I don't have that sibling that shares my physical characteristics. I don't ever think about that because my life is and has always been complete just the way it is. Since birth, my parents have been just that, MY parents, and I love the fact that I am adopted. I just think it will be cool to have a little one whose truly part of my biological makeup. That may be a hard thing for anyone to comprehend except those lucky individuals out there that are adopted. Just something I thought about and wanted to share. Here are a few pictures of the nursery and Dylan's "corner" of our room.
Vintage storybook pages printed on canvases: above his cribABC Cross-stitch my grandma made for me; my old toy box w/ a new paint job Changing tableI stenciled his monogram above the chest
Rockin'&Readin' corner; my grandpa built the book rack:)
Dylan's "corner" of our bedroom
My grandpa built this cradle and all 3 of my nephews used it!
We had our 36 week check up today. Dylan has made his "flip" in the right direction. Yeah! Dr. Deed said everything was good and I was making a little progress towards the big day, not much, but a small step in the right direction. That's all we needed to hear! We go back in one week!
36 weeks complete! (8-6-09)